#now seb's got him with those big feelings :(( i love them sm

[hcneysoaked]

@fcade​: sent ❛ and then i knew that i could become homesick for you too . ❜ eli and seb reuniting after the holidays c: ( source )

        Despite their frequent text exchanges and phone calls over the course of the week, Elijah knew there was no denying just how much he had missed really seeing––  being with Sebastian. Scanning the airport with a hasty excitement, he feels a sudden wave of relief over having agreed to be picked up. Any other ride back home would’ve gone at agonizing pace, only aided by the disorientation brought on by the plane ride. Instead, he’s able to tackle him the moment he spots Sebastian’s face. He doesn’t go straight for the other’s lips as he normally would, just clings on before pulling away for a moment to beam up at him. “I missed you.” So much. It doesn’t need to be said, from either of them, and for now Elijah is happy to simply bask in the quiet comfort of being back in his presence. There was nothing terribly unbearable about going back home, not for such a short period of time at least, and he appreciated the time together, but his parents’ questioning was intrusive enough to rival his own nosiness. Any building frustration had melted away now as he listens to the other speak, hardly having said a word himself. He feels a warmth spread at his admission, but it’s more of a comfort than any embarrassment. Tilting his head up, he kisses Sebastian with a rare sort of tenderness. “Were you sitting on that thought for long?” he teases, but his expression remains gentle. “I was homesick too.”

[carpsurprise]

Can I request Memory and Teach for Sam and Sebastian, please??

aaaa this is quite long!! also i apologize for it sitting for a while, this was p tough but i do love both of the boys sm :,) !!

memory:

what memory are they most fond of? 

-sam: sam remembers one of the first friends he ever made when he was still living in zuzu city! his friend’s parents kinda doubled as his own, and saw his friend’s dad as a father figure when kent was away! his friend’s dad was super big on music and taught his son how to play a few instruments, and sam really loved how close they all were! his friend’s dad bought him his first acoustic guitar :,)

-seb: when him and sam were younger robin allowed sam to come on a camping trip with them!! it was the first time sam and seb really were close for an extended period of time and they were able to do some stuff on their own for the first time!! seb remembers sam being suuuper bad at fishing and struggling to start a fire (despite say he was the best at both)... the whole trip is a fun memory for him!

what memory bothers them? 

-sam: his mom blew up on him and vincent for something super small. sam was old enough to piece together she wasn’t upset with them, but was just stressed about kent. vincent didn’t understand what he had done wrong and took it really bad, and was kinda distant from jodi for a little bit just because he was scared to make her mad again.

-seb: anything that has to do with his father! he tries to repress it as much as possible instead of dealing with it, but sometimes he’ll have a good memory with his father come up and then feels guilty for resenting him! 

what is something from the past they've learned from? 

-sam: always check up on everyone! if someone seems like they’re struggling.. even a little.. he’ll offer some help or at least some encouraging words. he learned esp with sebastian and keeping in tune with him, but it works for when his mom is super stressed too!

-seb: not to waste his breath on those that don’t deserve it! he’ll be the bigger person and not fight with others on trivial stuff that has no real outcome. he’s not one for confrontation anyway, but if someone’s looking for someone to back them up, it’s not gonna be him. 

what is a memory that always makes them laugh?

-sam: these 2 are connected, but def sometime he pranked seb. anytime he’s made seb (lightheartedly, ofc) annoyed he enjoys it. he lives to innocently mess with others and finds the funniest moments are where he’s successfully caught someone off guard. but, there was a time when he was younger kent got stuck on a water slide… he doesn’t let kent live that down, despite knowing the slide was built for kids. 

-seb: i think canonically seb smiles thinking about how sam is leading in community service hours and i thiiink another dialogue is similar to that. it seems like memories with sam make him chuckle if they cross his mind! sam launching snowballs accidentally into lewis’ face, tripping over his own feet in front of penny.. etc

teach:

what is one thing they wish to teach the world? 

-sam: not so much the world, but he’d love to teach vincent to be himself as he is!! and to pursue what he wants no matter what jodi or anyone would say against it!!

-seb: he hopes that as he is… people will learn to be more compassionate and not jump to conclusions about a person. he knows he’s a likable guy, just hopes sometimes people will learn to see past his faults.

what is something they think is important that isn't taught at school? 

-sam: mental health!! i think he’d be a big advocate for knowing what’s going on in the head and how to catch certain things early. teach people its ok to breakdown!! there’s nothing wrong with needing a break and taking it easy… teach kids that it’s okay to be upset. 

-seb: honestly? computer sciences. i mean you have keyboarding and such but like? viruses, simple stuff like settings and such? not touched on a lot! he gets so sick doing simple tasks for people sooo often, esp when it’s like basic stuff! gotta teach some computer smarts (so no one bothers him when he’s busy lsdkflkds)

what is something they wish they knew earlier? 

-sam: lifes too short to mope around and be upset about insignificance things!! gotta look at the positives in bad situations and take nothing for granted! his dad being away kinda taught him a lot about mortality, and now makes sure to appreciate the little things!

-seb: people do care about him. he’s more secure with his friends now, but it took him years to warm up and not feel like a burden/annoyance to them. he now knows if he does feel down both abby and sam are ready to jump to his side… even if he doesn’t think he’ll leave a ~lasting impact~ on the world, he takes comfort he at least brings them some joy from time to time.

what was their best and worst school subject?

-sam: he’s v good at science-y stuff! like the plant/animal part of biology (even stuff like enzymes etc!!) and finds a lot of interest in it!! if he can do like hands on labs he learns the best and its easier to apply his knowledge!

-seb: english! def the english teacher’s fave kid. likes classics and the drama of shakespeare… won’t really read aloud unless he’s called on. he’s super good at grammar and english has always come super easy to him! he also really likes history but only specifics of it.

were they a "good student"? why or why not?

-sam: ohh no. definitely a good bit of that is his adhd, but teachers ofc never really took him seriously. i think he’s v bright and intelligent but.. traditional learning is not for him.

-seb: he’s the kid that got “a pleasure to have in class” on his report card simply bc he never spoke! the kid that the loud and rowdy kids get sat next to to be a ‘good influence’... good grades until he hit his teen years and started feeling.. y’know... gloomy.

[oofchris]

⌠ MADISON BAILEY, 19, CISFEMALE, SHE/HER ⌡ welcome back to gallagher academy, CHRISTINA ' CHRIS ' ANDERSON! according to their records, they’re a FIRST year, specializing in MACGYVER SURVIVAL SKILLS & NAVIGATION + PROTECTION & ENFORCEMENT; and they DID NOT go to a spy prep high school. when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of ( speckles of dried paint on fingers, cruising round on a longboard, joints tucked behind ears wrapped in colourful papers ). when it’s the ( sagittarius )’s birthday on 12/27/2001, they always request their PHO from the school’s chefs. looks like they’re well on their way to graduation. ⌿ mochi, 24, she/her, gmt ⍀

@gallagherintro​

hi uwu, here is a new baby who is not very baby but still a lil baby

 . . . it got quite long so tldr; she’s a stubborn art hoe from california who’s dad died so she’s come to gallagher bc her mom is a professor in the p+e major <3 

parallels

wyldstyle  — the lego movie: 85%

mulan — mulan: 84%

nymphadora tonks — harry potter: 83%

princess fiona — shrek: 83%

robin buckley — stranger things: 82%

here is a full list

HISTORY

potential triggers — car accident, parental death, divorce

so she’s grown up on on the west coast p much ??? her whole life. her mom worked as a bodyguard for sum famous peeps, dad was doctor but occasionally also a medic in the field — they didn’t always see eye to eye and divorced when chris was around nine. it was mostly to do with chris’ future like whether she’d go to spy prep school and follow in their footsteps and her dad didn’t want that for her so they disagreed, and she lived with him instead, living a more or less normal life. her mom then moved away when the opportunity to become a professor at gallagher presented itself, so they’ve really not been close at all since then

lived fairly comfortably, either way her dad had money and her mom sent support too. her father definitely earns less from no longer being in the spy world but he vowed to leave that behind when he divorced his wife and other than a few people from his past popping up unannounced, he kept that vow. they moved around a couple times in order to keep chris safe, and especially when someone did find them ( even if it was friendly ) but mostly grew up in california, and a lot of it is to do with the fact chris loves it there so much

but chris knows about the spy world, what her mom does and the type of school she works at, but it never interested her enough to try and reach out or fight her dad on it as she enjoyed her life 

she remembers her mom as someone stubborn, argumentative, volatile which is the opposite of her dad who was patient, loving and endearing — so it’s a no brainer for her, she loves her dad a lot and he gave up a lot for her while her mom gave chris up for that world, her job, etc aka nada

BUT her dad died in a car accident recently that she was also in but was only a bit beaten up at most ( has some cuts / new scars, learn more below ) leaving her mother to swiftly pick her up and enrol her into gallagher, more to keep an eye on her than anything. 

her mom chose her majors and some of her classes for her, which chris is mad about, but mainly bc looking at what ones were offered she’d def pick macgyver anyway, and her mom argued p+e was a step into the physical and combat side of thing without being too heavy on it ( tho it’s the major she teaches so she’s biased and chris just thinks she wants to be closer ) but tbh ? chris just doesn’t want her mom to be right whatsoever or have the satisfaction of thinking she knows her daughter in anyway at all but she knows if she went undecided she’d probably pick those up again in her second year so she’s just ‘ going with it ‘ begrudgingly as if she has no choice

PERSONALITY

extremely stubborn, which she gets from her mom, would rather ruin her life than go back on something or admit she was wrong, if she apologises for something she'll find a way to do it where she's not actually ever saying the words ' im sorry ' or ' i was wrong ' and would rather start another argument than do that — but obviously she loves other people apologising to her

she is generally nice ??? i just think she can be irritated easy ?????? like a bit of a hot head tho she'd argue she's chill, she is mostly chill but likes to debate, be right, and can be very my way or the high way at times — i’ll figure her out more as i play her bc i can’t tell if she’s mean or not but i don’t think so, just a bit tougher than she needs to be 

in my head she’s like a seb/luc hybrid so . . . take that as you will 

doesn’t dislike gallagher ( mostly ) but thinks all the legacies — even tho she technically is one, she doesn’t identify as one — are entitled spoiled brats and should get their heads out of their ass, doesn't like that being a legacy is even a thing though a lot of it definitely comes from her bitter resentment towards her mom and how she'd have rather leave her and her dad than leave the spy life hbsjhbsjhb also i think bc of her mom she has level 5 clearance which . . . she’s not complaining about but definitely complaining that clearance levels are even a thing, she’s gonna contradict herself a lot, i feel it

MISC

i THINK she’s only arrived, like, at the start of spring semester tbh, she wasn’t here for fall so she is new new

halfway through her first year at stanford studying art alongside film and media as a minor before her mom brought her to gallagher — which she's kind of not happy about like she understands her dad didn't want it for her, she also wanted to just stay in california but the only family she has now is on her mom's side.

she's still enrolled at stanford, though dropped her minor, and is studying online for her major as she's made it clear to her mom she doesn't want to be a spy so she pulled a few strings with the stanford admission board to allow her studying to continue ( idek if this is allowed i'm just pretending her mom is powerful enough to do it ) — it was a big reason chris agreed to come to gallagher, not that she had much of a choice, bc she wants her ‘ normal ‘ life and her ‘ normal ‘ degree regardless of being at a spy school

only her mom calls her christina and she actually hates it so pls dont unless you are trying to get on her bad side — also she probs avoids her mom like the plague so don’t bring that up either

often covered in little cuts and bruises from her skating but she’s got two fresh / soon to be scars on the left side of her face on the top of her cheek bone and on her jaw from a shards of glass when she was in the car accident — she is the type to pick her scabs until they bleed again, too, so i picture her with loads of little scars especially on her hands, elbows and knees

she did learn self defense from her dad growing up and she has studied jiujitsu and akido since she was around thirteen, she also boxes but it's more casual like for stress and stuff rather than something she takes overly seriously

she likes surfing, diving, enjoys the kind of world that exists underwater where it's just peaceful and calm so she will be around the lake a lot / at the pool if you need to find her

she’s 5’3 and never wears heels

pansexual and while it might change i wanna say she's not overly sexual, like wouldn't have hookups for no reason ?? but potentially some one night stands or drunken mistakes or whatever. doesn't look down on sluts but i think she doesn't have the most confidence in that area, or in self esteem in general, so she'll ??? only really have a frequent thing if she feels Hella comfortable

the type to have crushes tho, but not act on them at all bc again self esteem issues 

bit of a tomboy, skater, stoner — though she wouldn't identify as one — really loves movies and can be a proper filmophile, probably has more film soundtracks on her spotify unwrapped than she does actual artists and don't get her started on Women— in film bc she won't stop 

very active, sporty, probs trying to parkour around campus

enjoys painting, sketching, simply creating things — often is filming, riding a longboard, working on some kind of little project she'll take too seriously but won't show people until it's perfect

is a little pretentious at times ??? doesn't necessarily mean to be but if it's a debate on a topic she's passionate about ( such as art, film, etc ) then she will try to ensure you know just how knowledgeable she is on it, she's not afraid to flex but she wouldn't outwardly flex for no reason if that makes sense 

she also . . . feels p dumb at gallagher tbh, a lot of her strengths lie in her creativity and art and now she’s very ??? wtf am i doing ?? but she will continue to act like she knows !

can speak english, french, german and spanish all pretty fluently, italian well enough to get by, knows a bit of japanese bc she’s . . . a weeb sometimes but also bc of her martial arts

CONNECTIONS

FAMILY / CHILDHOOD FRIENDS ( SPY ) — so this would more than likely be before her parents divorce, but she’s not against keeping in contact a little if she liked you, it could have also been a family who reached out to her dad afterwards because while he’d move away / hide his location promptly after, he would still help them if they needed it ( 1 / ? )

FAMILY / CHILDHOOD FRIENDS ( NON SPY ) — same thing, but would have probably been after the divorce, just normal families that her and her dad knew, neighbours, work colleagues, school friends, would more than likely have also needed to be west coast sorta area but if your muse was there briefly, they could have kept in contact once they’d left ( 0 / ? )

LEGACIES — she potentially . . . won’t like you if you’re a legacy and you are egotistical / assholey even a tiny bit, bc that basically proves her argument that they’re ALL like that jshbjsbjs but i wud like her to have legacies that she . . . hates that she likes as well, i think she’ll realise p quickly most are fine lmao

ART HOES — whether they’re into painting as well and they do it together or they let her paint them !

SMOKE / SKATE BUDS — one or the other, both, whatever !! 

A HOOK UP THAT’S EITHER ALREADY HAPPENED OR GOING TO — in my head she’s a bit ??? w sex tbh so maybe plot this out a bit more but can be a ?? positive relationship or a negative one idm

CRUSHES !!!!!!!!! — she’s not even been at the school long but im certain she probs has some already

i’m not good w wanted connections so pls just hmu if u have ideas and as usual like dis for plots / jus message me, i’ll be on discord !! if you don’t have/use discord just message me first on tumblr bc otherwise i wont realise jhbsjhbjhbsj

[thieving-magpiexhunting-tiger]

1-78 for both my boys <3

SOoooo manyyyyyy

1: Kitchen Counter, Couch, or on top of the dryer? Is the dryer on? If not couch. -JM Counter. -SM

2: Your last sexual encounter: Good or Bad and why: Good, always good. What can I say? Good partners. -JM Same as Jim, good, good partners. -SM

3: A fictional person that you think would be good in bed: Fictional…I keep thinking Iron man. He looks like he would be a good bottom. -JM This isn’t something I think about too much, I will admit. James Bond? Or maybe Princess Leia? Could just be me. -SM

4: Something that never fails to make you horny: School girl outfits. Blood, knives, guns, leather, lace, need I go on?. -JM Glasses, blood, knives, pain. -SM

5: Where is one place you would never have sex: Parents grave? -JM Jimmm….-SM No, you did it there already. -JM Not what I meant. Umm…middle of a street. -SM

6: The most awkward moment during a sexual experience was when ______________ All I can think of is TMI…a guy passed out once, said he was fine. He wasn’t fine. -JM Wrong brother. -SM

7: Weirdest thing that ever made you horny: I’m sure something on my above list could be considered weird. Breeding? Knotting? -JM No idea, not much for kink shamming. Ohh, being kink shamed, that’s done it. -SM

8: What is the best way to sexually bind someone: Handcuffs, Rope, or Other [if other please explain]: Completely bind? Rope. -JM Rope. -SM

9: What is the fastest way to make you horny: See no. 4. -J&SM

10: Top or bottom? Top. -JM Top. -SM

11: We were about to ____________ but then ______________ [example: we were about to have sex but then his mom walked in] We were about to rim but then his brother walked in. -SM Weirdest threesome yet. Umm, We were about to do it but then he realized he didn’t clean out. -JM

12: Is one orgasm enough? Are multiple orgasms necessary? One is enough, wouldn’t say no to more. -JM Me too. -SM

13: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find: There’s this one dildo, knotting…don’t want to talk about it. -JM Not sex related but like 50 guns. That wouldn’t look too good. -SM

14: Weirdest nickname a significant other has ever called you: I’m not sure there are weird ones? Kitten, baby, Jimmy, daddy, king. -JM I’m not sure I have weird ones either. Tiger, knight, Basher, Jim’s called me that before. -SM

15: Two things you like [or dislike] about oral sex: Taste and feel. You Decide if I like or hate it. -JM Something to do with my mouth, pleasuring the other. -SM

16: Weirdest sexual act some has performed [or tried to perform] on/with you: Oh no, piss kinks, scat kinks, suffocation. All for choking but head in pillow holding me down? I’ll pass. -JM With Jim on the piss kinks. -SM

17: Have you ever tasted yourself? [If no, would you?] [If yes, what did you think?] Yes, it’s okay, I would prefer it to be someone else’s or someone else to take it. -JM Have, would again, don’t mind it. -SM

18: Is it ever okay to not use a condom: If we want another child and know the other are clean, which we do. -JM Condoms don’t stop the kids but yeah. -SM

19: Who was the sexiest teacher you ever had? Me. -JM Jim. -SM

20: A food that you would like to use during a sexual experience: Chocolate. Always chocolate. I would like to try whipped topping. -JM Cheese. I’m trying to convince them it’s a good idea. -SM

21: How big is too big: 8-9 is normally the limit. Could go bigger but that’s a good amount with no pain. -JM 9-10 I would say, Jim’s about that. -SM

22: One sexual thing you would never do: I think after trying the ones in 16 there’s nothing left on that list, though I would never want to try them again. -JM Yeah, I wouldn’t want to do Jim’s list on 16 either. -SM

23: Biggest turn on: Didn’t we do this already? School girl, lace, leather. -JM Pain, probably. -SM

24: Three spots that drive you insane: Nipples, hair, dick. -JM Dick, obviously, thighs, scars. -SM

25: Worst possible time to get horny: Middle of a murder? Blood everywhere, happens every time. -JM Giving a presentation in Uni. -SM

26: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans: Yes, always. -JM Of course, I do. -SM

27: Worst sexual idea you ever had: Gang bang of people I didn’t know. -JM Probably going to regret the cheese. -SM

28: How much fapping is too much fapping: Not something I’ve ever been much for but come on, more that once or twice a week is a bit much. -JM Once a day is fine, doing it more than that there might be an issue. -SM

29: Best sexual complement you ever got: Not sure I’ve ever got a compliment? Magic dick, maybe? -JM That I knew what I was doing and hit every spot. -SM

30: Bald, landing strip, Jumanji: Either of the first two. -JM If I see a landing strip, I will start laughing. Why give up when you’re so close? Finish or don’t start. -SM

31: Is it good sex if you don’t nut: It can be, yeah. If it’s good for the other person. -JM I know the right answer is yes but…-SM

32: Fill in the blank: "If they ____________, we are fuckin" Have a hole. -SM Horny on main, Sebastian. I have higher standards. Are married to us. -JM Fine, marriage and all that. -SM

33: What your favorite part of your body: I like my muscle, I’m quite strong. -SM …I got nothing. Eyes, maybe? Mouth? -JM

34: Favorite foreplay activities: Kissing. -JM Touching. -SM

35: Love (>,<, or =) Sex For those of us who don’t remember our math thats “greater than, less than, or equal to] > -JM = -SM

36: What do you wear to bed? Nothing to t-shirt and boxers, depending on who is there and how warm it is. -JM Nothing. -SM

37: When was the first time you masturbated: 11? -JM 10 I think. -SM

38: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself? Yes. -JM Yes. -SM

39: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside? Yes, every time I get a chance. Last date night. -JM Last date night it was. -SM

40: Have/would you ever have sex outside? Well this is the last question again. Yes. -JM Yes, last date night. -SM

41: Have/would you ever had a threesome? Nooooo….All the time. -JM Often we have. -SM

42: What is one random object you’ve used to masturbate? Don’t use random objects. Tooth brush once. -JM He fucked me, with a toothbrush! Ummm…Long story but a cucumber. -SM

43: Have/would you ever masturbate at work/school? Work, yes. For a while, I worked at a school. Yes again. -JM Work yes, school, no. -SM

44: Have/would you ever have sex on a plane? Yes. -JM Yes. -SM

45: What is one song you’d like to have sex to? That would be lost on both of us. -JM

46: What is something nonsexual that makes you horny? Scars. -JM Lip biting and glasses. -SM

47: Most attractive celebrity? That Michael Fassbender guy is hot. -JM You mean James Bond and Princess Leia wasn’t enough? -SM

48: Do you watch gay/lesbian porn? why/why not? No, don’t really watch any when I can just watch two of the others. -JM Same as Jim. -SM

49: If a child was born on the occasion of the last time you had sex, how old would that child be right now? Well, the one that is currently inside me exists and isn’t out. But if there was another then we wouldn’t even know of its existence yet. -JM As old as Jim’s second one. -SM

50: Has anyone ever posted nude pictures of you online? Yes. -JM No…well, actually, yeah. Yeah, those are out there. -SM

51: What is one thing that NEVER makes you horny? We once again refer you to the dreaded number 16. -JM

52: Do you have stretch marks? (How do you feel about them? Has anyone ever had a problem with them?) I don’t have them, I don’t have a problem with them. As far as I know no one has. -JM I have some, don’t mind them or anything. Don’t think the others have. -SM

53: Do you like giving head? (why/why not) Don’t mind it, see 15 for why. -JM Did we mess up somewhere? This was 15 wasn’t it? Or was that receiving? -SM

54: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in? Don’t mind them. Not one to go after people covered I them but some are okay. -JM I have a couple, don’t mind them really, it’s their bodies. -SM

55: How would you feel about taking someones virginity? Nope, nope, nope. -JM Nope, nope. -SM

56: Is there any food you would NOT recommend using during a sexual encounter? Garlic? -JM Hot peppers. -SM

57: Is there anything you do on Tumblr that you would not like your significant other to see? On what now? -JM What’s Tumblr and where did the e go? -SM

58: Do you own any sex toys? (what is it? (how long have you had it?) Yes, we do not have time to go into the giant box full, that would be hours. -JM And don’t forget the dungeon. -SM

59: Would you give your significant other unrestricted access to your Tumblr for a day? I guess, still don’t know what this is though. -JM I don’t see why not. -SM

60: Would you be offended if your significant other suggested you get plastic surgery? I think so. -JM Yeah, I can’t think of a way that could be good, if they’re suggesting it then they aren’t happy with me. -SM

61: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute? Been the second. The first sounds better. -JM Yeah, star. -SM

62: Do you watch porn? Nope. -JM No. -SM

63: How small is too small? Don’t think there’s a thing? I mean something can be worked out. -JM Yeah, there are other things that can be done if needed. -SM

64: Have you ever been called a freak? Why? Yes, more times than I care to count. -JM You’ve read through the history, take your pick. -SM

65: Who gave you your last kiss? Did it mean anything? Seb. Yes, it meant he wanted me to put his name down as the last. -JM Jim and it meant l Iove him, it’s clear to see it didn’t mean anything to him though. -SM

66: Would you switch phones with your significant other for a day? That’s all about controlling I think. I mean I have nothing to hide but I don’t want people to not have enough trust in me to need to take my phone. -JM They can but it would be a whole thing with work and getting in contact with me. -SM

67: Do you feel comfortable going "commando"? Not really. -JM Yeah. -SM

68: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn't shaved their pubic hair? Depends on how long it’s been and man or woman, I think. -JM I…could do it. -SM

69: If you could give yourself head, would you? Yeah, probably. -JM I think so. -SM

70: Booty or Boobs? Booty. -JM Boobs. -SM

71: If you had a penis, what would you name it? He is little J and that is enough of that. -JM If…what do they mean if? …his name is Basher. -SM

72: Have you ever been on an official date? No, never why would I do that? I’m married and have 3253270527 kids, yes, I’ve dated. -JM Yeah, too many probably. -SM

73: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?) I was going to say Seb but we had an open relationship so no. -JM I did once, whole thing, I was trying to get out of the relationship. They didn’t want me to. I wasn’t happy. -SM

74: If you were a stripper, what would your name be? Big dick? I don’t know, I’m tired. -JM In honor of Jim’s last typo Bid Bick. -SM

75: Have you ever had sex in your parents bed? (Would you?) No, I haven’t and won’t. -JM That’s just… no, no, wrong. -SM

76: How would you react if you found out your parents had sex in your bed? Umm terrified, they’ve been dead for 30 years. -JM I would let them finish and then burn the bed. -SM

77: What was your reaction the first time you saw a penis/vagina What is that? -JM I don’t remember. -SM

78: If you had a penis/vagina for a day, what are five things you would do? …how many things can you do with one? I mean give and receive and get yourself off but with a vagina, you can receive and get yourself off so I guess those two. If someone knows three more things, let me know. -JM Yeah, sex I guess. I don’t know what else? Am I fully a girl? Or just me with a vagina instead? -SM